I would like a dollar for every time I have presented a carry-on for a week’s worth of travel, and heard a gasp! I would definitely have some fun pocket money. It’s true, I have the gift . . . truly, just lots of experience. Regardless, I hope these tried and true packing tips will take you a long way, whether executive or spouse:
Practice discipline. It is absolutely necessary when packing. Make a plan – then stick to it. Do not be tempted to throw in a few more items “just because” or “just in case.” Yes, already, I can hear the groans.
Outline your trip on paper. List a daily schedule and note if it is necessary to change clothes for the evening.
Ladies first. Choose two colors to coordinate, and then find a splash of color to accent such as a top, blouse or sweater. For example, black is a basic color that is forgiving when traveling, so I add beige, brown, or silver as the coordinating color. Next, I choose my accent color, often red. Using a couple of suits, I add blouses or sweaters with the skirts or slacks and create multiple outfits. Don’t leave it to chance – list the designated use of each piece according to the time you will wear it, and with accessories including shoes. Choose your travel shoes, knowing when you will wear them again, and the same with evening shoes, handbag and daytime shoes. I limit myself to three pairs only, one I will wear traveling. After I have chosen my clothes, I add one more blouse in case of a spill. I place travel-size toiletries (cosmetic counter samples) in a gallon baggie, meds and basic make-up in my purse and I’m ready to go!
And the gentlemen. Men, we ladies think you have it very easy. Use the same outline for the trip. Wear the blue blazer, pack the suit, dress slacks that coordinate with the blazer or suit jacket, add dress shirts (don’t forget your cufflinks and color staves), and an extra pair of shoes for rotation. Add one short sleeved knit shirt as an extra. Prepare your ditty bag with mini-sized products from the travel aisle (new one each trip), and away you go! Meds go in your briefcase.
Ease of packing comes with practice. What one MUST adhere to is the discipline not to start improvising or compromising towards the end. The bonus of this discipline and well orchestrated plan? A lighter and smaller travel bag you will have in your possession the entire trip, more time – not wasted standing near the luggage belt – and no risk of the airline losing your luggage. Try it!
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Dining Etiquette: Help! My Fork Has Fallen . . .
I have dined with them all . . . celebrities, ambassadors, politicians, musicians and plenty of C-level executives. There’s one thing that all have in common: concerns of table manners – the right ones!
What brings this to mind is that Larry and I had the most privileged opportunity to host a dinner for the Boys & Girls Club Youth of the Year Finalists. What was this intimate dinner about?
First, personal goals are attainable if you stay the course, enthusiastically explained and exemplified by Dr Pepper Snapple CEO Larry Young. The other purpose: table manners.
Co-hosting this event was Lynn Duncan, Director of Catering, Anatole, Hilton in Dallas, who led us through the basics as I pointed out guidelines of appropriate social conversations. Truly, we have all navigated through these waters, and you can imagine who was listening most intently – yes, the adults sitting among the young people.
If you are that executive or ExecuMate overwhelmed at a dinner viewing a sea of glasses or wondering which bread plate is yours, you’re not alone. It is a common concern among executives and spouses when dining. When I address ExecuMates and ask what they need information on, they always express their desire of dining in good graces.
ExecuMate can assist you through attitude-boosting, positive power-of-two building seminars. Upon request, we can also address social etiquette and table manners through a custom-designed seminar tailored just for your needs. If your company would like to plan one of these seminars, contact us at colette.young@execumate.net.
Are you a good ambassador for your company via table manners? People do notice.
What brings this to mind is that Larry and I had the most privileged opportunity to host a dinner for the Boys & Girls Club Youth of the Year Finalists. What was this intimate dinner about?
First, personal goals are attainable if you stay the course, enthusiastically explained and exemplified by Dr Pepper Snapple CEO Larry Young. The other purpose: table manners.
Co-hosting this event was Lynn Duncan, Director of Catering, Anatole, Hilton in Dallas, who led us through the basics as I pointed out guidelines of appropriate social conversations. Truly, we have all navigated through these waters, and you can imagine who was listening most intently – yes, the adults sitting among the young people.
If you are that executive or ExecuMate overwhelmed at a dinner viewing a sea of glasses or wondering which bread plate is yours, you’re not alone. It is a common concern among executives and spouses when dining. When I address ExecuMates and ask what they need information on, they always express their desire of dining in good graces.
ExecuMate can assist you through attitude-boosting, positive power-of-two building seminars. Upon request, we can also address social etiquette and table manners through a custom-designed seminar tailored just for your needs. If your company would like to plan one of these seminars, contact us at colette.young@execumate.net.
Are you a good ambassador for your company via table manners? People do notice.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Moving: Making the Transition
Confidence is a great feeling. It can be noticed in one’s facial expression, posture, tone of voice, dress and stride. But when we embark upon a new life in a new place and are shaken in degrees, how can we regain our confidence?
“Fake it until you make it” is an expression we have all heard for those going through difficult times. Even though my insides were unsure of what was going on, my outside appearance needed to show calm demeanor. So, how did I learn this?
Blazing a trail from Missouri to Poland, back to the midwest and onto Dallas certainly has built my confidence in making difficult transitions. But prior to that, 20 years of classical piano performance prepped me for those uncertain moments! No matter where I had to perform, if I had my music inside me . . . prepared, skilled, confident, I could perform it . . . anywhere! Once I took a deep breath, relaxed, and started playing, it all came naturally. The music sailed out as rehearsed.
So it is with being prepared for moving. Prepared? Skilled? Confident? This is where ExecuMate can help you.
ExecuMate can prepare you for your future cultural experience, equip you with the necessary tools for this move, and be in daily contact with you the first 30 days of your new adventure.
Buy new address book – check. Pack boxes – check. Put ExecuMate on speed dial – check. Gain confidence – check. No faking it now!
“Fake it until you make it” is an expression we have all heard for those going through difficult times. Even though my insides were unsure of what was going on, my outside appearance needed to show calm demeanor. So, how did I learn this?
Blazing a trail from Missouri to Poland, back to the midwest and onto Dallas certainly has built my confidence in making difficult transitions. But prior to that, 20 years of classical piano performance prepped me for those uncertain moments! No matter where I had to perform, if I had my music inside me . . . prepared, skilled, confident, I could perform it . . . anywhere! Once I took a deep breath, relaxed, and started playing, it all came naturally. The music sailed out as rehearsed.
So it is with being prepared for moving. Prepared? Skilled? Confident? This is where ExecuMate can help you.
ExecuMate can prepare you for your future cultural experience, equip you with the necessary tools for this move, and be in daily contact with you the first 30 days of your new adventure.
Buy new address book – check. Pack boxes – check. Put ExecuMate on speed dial – check. Gain confidence – check. No faking it now!
Monday, June 7, 2010
Building a Foundation
Have you heard of the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation? It was back in the news today, when Melinda Gates announced that the organization would spend $1.5 billion dollars over the next five years on health programs for women and children in poor nations.
The foundation was created by the Gateses in 2000, and demonstrates acceptance and teamwork in their successful executive/spouse relationship. And it also provides some lessons about what can happen when an executive and his or her spouse set goals together.
When you and your spouse are heading down the same path, following a plan you both had a part in creating, you have reached the crucial element of acceptance in your relationship. You’ve each accepted working toward common goals that will benefit both of you. Doing this, and persevering along the way, can provide very rewarding and fulfilling results.
The Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation was a dream the Gateses had as a team, and they followed through on making it a reality through a lot of hard work - together. Their joint dream has rewarded the executive/spouse couple with an organization that is changing and improving lives on a daily basis. Two of those lives they have changed, on their journey, are their own.
What can you and your spouse work on to accept and commit to? You both could be pleasantly surprised with what the power of two can do, and you will become a stronger executive/spouse team as a result.
To learn more about the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation click here.
The foundation was created by the Gateses in 2000, and demonstrates acceptance and teamwork in their successful executive/spouse relationship. And it also provides some lessons about what can happen when an executive and his or her spouse set goals together.
When you and your spouse are heading down the same path, following a plan you both had a part in creating, you have reached the crucial element of acceptance in your relationship. You’ve each accepted working toward common goals that will benefit both of you. Doing this, and persevering along the way, can provide very rewarding and fulfilling results.
The Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation was a dream the Gateses had as a team, and they followed through on making it a reality through a lot of hard work - together. Their joint dream has rewarded the executive/spouse couple with an organization that is changing and improving lives on a daily basis. Two of those lives they have changed, on their journey, are their own.
What can you and your spouse work on to accept and commit to? You both could be pleasantly surprised with what the power of two can do, and you will become a stronger executive/spouse team as a result.
To learn more about the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation click here.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Mutual Support
A recent article in Reuters reminded me of one of the critical components to a successful and committed relationship, the component of absolute support.
The article focused on John Stankey, President and CEO of AT&T. When John was asked what he does with his limited free time, he responded he spends it with his family.
If you read the rest of the article you will realize what a crucial time it is in John’s life. He is playing a large role in making AT&T more successful than it has ever been with the addition of the iPhone into the AT&T operations. Yet, even with the obvious stress and complications of John’s career, he still maintains a level of commitment to his wife and three children, by spending his free time with them.
John demonstrates his absolute support of his executive spouse by balancing his commitment to AT&T and making her and his children his focus. He also says in the article that he wouldn’t wish his lifestyle on any of his family members, but by being there for him, his ExecuMate is showing her absolute support for him in return.
Demonstrating unwavering support for your executive spouse, and him or her demonstrating it in return, is one critical piece of the puzzle that will make your executive/spouse partnership a rewarding and successful journey.
The article focused on John Stankey, President and CEO of AT&T. When John was asked what he does with his limited free time, he responded he spends it with his family.
If you read the rest of the article you will realize what a crucial time it is in John’s life. He is playing a large role in making AT&T more successful than it has ever been with the addition of the iPhone into the AT&T operations. Yet, even with the obvious stress and complications of John’s career, he still maintains a level of commitment to his wife and three children, by spending his free time with them.
John demonstrates his absolute support of his executive spouse by balancing his commitment to AT&T and making her and his children his focus. He also says in the article that he wouldn’t wish his lifestyle on any of his family members, but by being there for him, his ExecuMate is showing her absolute support for him in return.
Demonstrating unwavering support for your executive spouse, and him or her demonstrating it in return, is one critical piece of the puzzle that will make your executive/spouse partnership a rewarding and successful journey.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Celebrity Apprentice
If you happened to catch Donald Trump’s “Celebrity Apprentice” last week, you may have noticed my husband, Larry, making a guest appearance. As the CEO of Dr Pepper Snapple, he introduced the final challenge to the remaining two competitors (Poison’s Brett Michaels and actress Holly Robinson Peete). I watched with pride as Larry laid out the challenge: create and market a new Snapple flavor weaving in their charities’ messages.
I also had the honor of dining with Mr. Trump before Larry’s spotlight performance. Among those at the table we discussed some of the challenges and opportunities that come with being an executive spouse. It boils down to a few critical elements of a successful executive/spouse partnership, including:
Team and trust. Both spouses must establish absolute trust in each other and know that they are in it as a team for the long-term. They need to accept that they’re in it together, know that they have a plan, and be willing to make it happen.
Relationship and responsibility. It’s about the power of two, and each member of the couple needs to be accountable to the other, and to themselves. It’s vital that both spouses realize that they need to approach the challenge as a team. The spouse climbing the corporate ladder can experience extreme pressure and loneliness along the way. Or, when one spouse gets a shiny new promotion and picks up the family to a new city or country, for instance, it may be difficult for the other spouse to immediately find a job in the new community. Instead of placing blame on the executive and bottling up resentment, the spouse needs to take responsibility and communicate his or her feelings and find a way pursue their own interests.
Understanding. For both the executive and the spouse, huge doses of understanding and acceptance are essential to staying connected – for the long term. Demonstrating understanding and support is a critical piece of the puzzle. Both spouses need to make concessions to make sure the other one is happy and fulfilled, and appreciates the other’s contributions. It’s incredibly rewarding when your spouse recognizes you as a valuable resource and partner, and it’s doubly rewarding when they share it with peers who recognize it, too. Watch any awards show on TV, and you’ll see countless examples of high-powered people profusely thanking their spouses for years of support.
Mettle. It isn’t easy, but being an ExecuMate is a natural mettle-building exercise. It’s easy to get lost and overshadowed, but remember to stand up for yourself and your spouse - be true to you.
Passion and perseverance. These two attributes are keys to success, no matter what you do. Find something you love – whether it’s a career, classes, hobby, philanthropy or volunteering – outside of your responsibilities as an executive spouse to ensure you are fulfilled.
It may take years to achieve your goals together, and both executive and spouse need to commit to not only the end result, but the journey, as well. Both need to recognize that there will be sacrifices along the way and it will take perseverance, but the end results can be rewarding on many fronts.
If you’re an executive spouse and seeking support from those who are on the same path, I’d love to hear from you. Sharing each others’ experiences is the best way to learn and grow. And no one will tell you “you’re fired.” I promise.
I also had the honor of dining with Mr. Trump before Larry’s spotlight performance. Among those at the table we discussed some of the challenges and opportunities that come with being an executive spouse. It boils down to a few critical elements of a successful executive/spouse partnership, including:
Team and trust. Both spouses must establish absolute trust in each other and know that they are in it as a team for the long-term. They need to accept that they’re in it together, know that they have a plan, and be willing to make it happen.
Relationship and responsibility. It’s about the power of two, and each member of the couple needs to be accountable to the other, and to themselves. It’s vital that both spouses realize that they need to approach the challenge as a team. The spouse climbing the corporate ladder can experience extreme pressure and loneliness along the way. Or, when one spouse gets a shiny new promotion and picks up the family to a new city or country, for instance, it may be difficult for the other spouse to immediately find a job in the new community. Instead of placing blame on the executive and bottling up resentment, the spouse needs to take responsibility and communicate his or her feelings and find a way pursue their own interests.
Understanding. For both the executive and the spouse, huge doses of understanding and acceptance are essential to staying connected – for the long term. Demonstrating understanding and support is a critical piece of the puzzle. Both spouses need to make concessions to make sure the other one is happy and fulfilled, and appreciates the other’s contributions. It’s incredibly rewarding when your spouse recognizes you as a valuable resource and partner, and it’s doubly rewarding when they share it with peers who recognize it, too. Watch any awards show on TV, and you’ll see countless examples of high-powered people profusely thanking their spouses for years of support.
Mettle. It isn’t easy, but being an ExecuMate is a natural mettle-building exercise. It’s easy to get lost and overshadowed, but remember to stand up for yourself and your spouse - be true to you.
Passion and perseverance. These two attributes are keys to success, no matter what you do. Find something you love – whether it’s a career, classes, hobby, philanthropy or volunteering – outside of your responsibilities as an executive spouse to ensure you are fulfilled.
It may take years to achieve your goals together, and both executive and spouse need to commit to not only the end result, but the journey, as well. Both need to recognize that there will be sacrifices along the way and it will take perseverance, but the end results can be rewarding on many fronts.
If you’re an executive spouse and seeking support from those who are on the same path, I’d love to hear from you. Sharing each others’ experiences is the best way to learn and grow. And no one will tell you “you’re fired.” I promise.
Friday, May 14, 2010
The Daily Question: What's for Dinner?
Recently, I was particularly surprised when an ExecuMate empty nester mentioned that her executive expressed disappointment that dinners weren’t regularly prepared. Now, having gone through the family journey myself, I understand that it’s important to gather family at the same table, at the same time, and regularly during the week, when possible. That’s another blog post. However, as an empty nester myself, I took pause with this one.
Truthfully, I have seen this discussion fall into two categories: A) Couples who say life has moved past cooking every night – and they enjoy the freedom of winging it, and B) Those who have not. So, what’s this all about? Control? Expectations?
I say it’s about communication. Let’s talk about a solution for Group B. Although this may sound a bit stilted at first, after a few runs, it will become part of your regular routine. Let’s say, on Sunday night (assuming it is the night before your work week), both spouses sit down and review their schedules together. You know, “I have a dinner this night, I have a meeting that night,” and each partner shares their known schedule. This way, there are no surprises, and quality dinners - and time spent together - will be meaningful, even special.
Another quick tip: Plan the type of food you’ll share on a specific night. For example, Italian on Wednesday night so both spouses can plan NOT to have Italian for lunch. It’s simple, it’s easy – and everybody wins. Bon appétit!
Truthfully, I have seen this discussion fall into two categories: A) Couples who say life has moved past cooking every night – and they enjoy the freedom of winging it, and B) Those who have not. So, what’s this all about? Control? Expectations?
I say it’s about communication. Let’s talk about a solution for Group B. Although this may sound a bit stilted at first, after a few runs, it will become part of your regular routine. Let’s say, on Sunday night (assuming it is the night before your work week), both spouses sit down and review their schedules together. You know, “I have a dinner this night, I have a meeting that night,” and each partner shares their known schedule. This way, there are no surprises, and quality dinners - and time spent together - will be meaningful, even special.
Another quick tip: Plan the type of food you’ll share on a specific night. For example, Italian on Wednesday night so both spouses can plan NOT to have Italian for lunch. It’s simple, it’s easy – and everybody wins. Bon appétit!
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